Group plans to head down the river from KC to St. Louis to see Mizzou-Illinois game.
Published: Aug 27, 2008
This is “Old School” meets Mark Twain.
What happens when two dozen middle-aged kids at heart lead a boat party down the Missouri River with plans to reach St. Louis in time for Saturday’s football blockbuster between the sixth-ranked MU Tigers and No. 20 Illinois?
Let 50-year-old Breck Anderson of Overland Park answer that.
“Think about it: The adventure, acting like you’re in college again, getting to the game,” Anderson says. “Think about how much fun we’re going to have at that game.
“The sense of freedom. It’s like for three days, you’re not married, you don’t have kids, you’re on the river. There’s nothing you can do but have fun. There are a lot of beautiful things to see on the Missouri River. It’s a pretty cool thing.”
The adventure is the brainchild of Pat Ryan, who knows a thing or two about planning a good time. He has organized trips to Pamplona, Spain, for the Running of the Bulls, and to the 2006 World Cup in Germany, where everyone in his group dressed like Elvis Presley.
Ever since Mizzou and Illinois started their annual series in 2002, Ryan has dreamed of boating the Big Muddy to St. Louis. He wasn’t alone.
“Surprisingly, this was in the back of a lot of people’s heads,” says Ryan, one of the 15 MU alumni in the group that includes seven former football players. “When I sent out the mass e-mail to about 200 people, a lot of people said, ‘I’ve always wanted to do that, too,’ and this is the right time to do it.”
The flotilla leaves at 6 a.m. Thursday from Ameristar Kansas City Casino and Hotel, and will go to Rocheport. They’ll dock, then head to Columbia, where classes began this week. After hitting the campus hot spots (including Harpo’s, of course), the group will spend the night in a hotel and leave Friday morning for St. Charles. More partying will ensue. On Saturday, they’ll navigate the final 45 miles to the Gateway Arch and head to the game at the Edward Jones Dome.
There are four boats in the armada: a pontoon boat and three power boats. The group has support vehicles driving to each night’s stopping point, and they’ll have trailers to pull the boats ashore (and to take them back home after the game). Oil trucks have been arranged to meet refueling needs along the way.
“It’s kind of a civilian military experience,” says Ryan, who lives in Leawood. “We have to plan all of our necessities out: ice, hydration, food, life jackets, and we’re just pawning off these roles on people.
“We plan on having a barbecue, maybe a generator, maybe an air conditioning unit, poker table, a marine radio in case we have to call the Coast Guard.”
The Coast Guard? What other group heading to the game has that contingency plan? It seems the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers suggested the marine radio.
“We have to go through only one lock, which is when we go from the Missouri River to the Mississippi,” Ryan explains. “When that feeds into the Mississippi, I have to veer left, and if I forget to do that, I’ll run them up on the rocks.”
Although one group member leads float trips on the Buffalo River in Arkansas, most of the group have merely spent time in a canoe or a whitewater raft on smaller rivers.
Scott Widman of Lenexa is one of the few group members with experience on the Missouri River, so he knows what to expect — sort of.
“There certainly is some danger, and that’s what kind of is intriguing about it,” says Widman, 41. “To be honest, that’s really what gets people excited. We can plan all we want, but we don’t really know what’s going to happen.”
Ryan dismisses such talk. He points to the Missouri River 340, an annual canoe/kayak race from Kansas City to St. Charles.
“People always hype things up too much, and then they hype things down too much. Things are never what you assume,” Ryan says. “They had, what, 100 kayakers go on the Mo. River 340? I feel safer on a pontoon than I do in a kayak.”
Widman smiles as he quickly interjects: “Well, yes and no.”
Anderson returns the grin as he quips: “If nobody dies, it’ll be a great trip. If someone does, well, it’ll still be a great trip, because I don’t know all these guys.”
Ryan initially planned to cap the group at 20. But as more boats became available, there was more room, and now 23 people are making the trip. Friends invited friends. In fact, there are some (gasp!) Kansas fans coming along.
“They’ll probably be the slave labor to fix the boats,” Ryan says with a laugh, “or be the rowers at the bottom of the boat like in the old days.”
Yep, the fun started even before the group hit the water.
Although they didn’t know what to expect on the river, they had a pretty good idea of what would happen on the boats.
All of the boats are registered and titled, as is required by law, and Ryan reiterated to Widman that everyone had to obtain a life jacket and wear it at all times. Those are two of the requirements for being on the water, according to the Missouri Water Patrol. It has a handbook of boating laws and responsibilities that Ryan read weeks ago.
The group also left a float plan with their wives, as suggested by the handbook. They also know it’s against the law to drive a boat while intoxicated, which is why they are making certain to have a designated driver on all four boats.
“We’ll probably play poker. We’ll probably drink a lot of beer,” Anderson says. “Somebody has to stay sober on each boat — I don’t know who that’s going to be — and then we have the football game, which will kick off what hopefully will be the best football season Missouri has ever had.”
Sounds idyllic. While others will be making the mad dash across Interstate 70 or hopping a train on game day, these fans will be taking it slow.
“The journey is actually more exciting than the destination,” Ryan says. “What a great way to explore Missouri. It’s a beautiful state. Anytime any of us cross over the Missouri River after this, we’ll think back to how glorious that trip was — or catastrophic. It could be the agony of defeat … or something awesome.”
Pete Grathoff's Work 